Kindness, The Soft Language I Now Speak to Myself

 Some of us had to become gentle because the world forgot to be

Turns out comfort isn’t found — it’s brewed, like tea, with time, warmth, and a little bit of magic

Hey Sunnies 💛,

If You’ve Been Listening to My Podcast...

Then you’ve probably heard me talk about how much I love being kind to myself. But let’s be honest — it wasn’t always like that. So, before we dive into how I got here, let me tell you a little story.

The Day English Broke My Heart...

The world tried to teach me through pain, but I only ever listened when someone spoke in kindness.

Back in primary school, I had an English teacher who ruled through fear. He set a pass mark and anyone who failed to meet it felt the full force of his disappointment—through pain. I used to meet his expectations until the day I missed the mark by just one point. One point. The beating I got left a blood clot on my thumb, a boil filled with blood, and a deep resentment toward English itself. After that, I stopped trying. I failed often, and the punishments kept coming until I was numb to it all.

Then came a strange moment during a parent-teacher meeting. For the first time, he was kind. And on our next exam? I passed. That day, something in me clicked: I respond best to kindness. But the world didn’t give me many chances to learn that lesson twice.

Mean World, Mean Me...

I wasn't too much — I was just too tender for the places that never learned to hold softness.

I didn’t grow up in a soft space. I was bullied—a lot. (But that’s a story for another day.) I got so used to unkindness, I started thinking it was just... normal. Natural. The way things were.

And when you're fed enough harshness, you start serving it to yourself too. Every mistake was met with self-punishment. Every misstep turned into an inner war. Then came the relationship that mirrored it all: coldness, cruelty, emotional distance. And somehow, I thought that was love.

I tried to call him out. But like clockwork, I became the villain in the story. And when you grow up in a world that constantly blames you for your pain, you start believing it must be true. (I unpack that whole hot mess on my podcast Navigating Life Diaries. Grab tea. It’s a ride.)

The Moment I Chose Me....

I became the gentle voice I needed to hear, even when the world got loud and cruel.

The glow-up started the day I said, "You know what? I actually deserve love — and I’ll start with mine.”

I began learning who I was, and whew — turns out I’m a softie. I feel everything deeply. I cry often. I need reassurance. But most of all? I thrive in kindness.

Practicing self-kindness at first felt illegal. Especially when I made mistakes — because I was taught that messing up equals punishment. But now? I make a mistake and take myself out for coffee. I buy myself a lil treat. Why growth isn’t about perfection — it’s about staying gentle through the mess.

When Scofield Taught Me What I Deserved...

Being kind to myself wasn’t a trend — it was survival dressed in softness.

Last December, I was rewatching Prison Break — crying through every episode. Why? Because of Michael Scofield and Sara. No matter how chaotic his life got, Michael was always kind to her. Soft. Gentle. And that’s all I ever wanted. A love that chose kindness even when everything else felt like war.

That’s when I realized —

I had become that person for myself.

I speak softly to myself.

I hold space for my pain.

I comfort me first.

And now? I don’t tolerate meanness from anyone — not even a whisper of it. Because I’ve created a home inside me where only kindness lives.

Dear Sunny, You Deserve Softness Too...

Once I learned to be soft with my scars, I stopped apologizing for how deeply I feel

Maybe you grew up in a world that bruised your spirit.

Maybe, like me, you believed that being mean to yourself was “discipline. "But truth? Kindness isn’t weakness — it’s the most radical love there is.

It’s not always easy. There are days you’ll want to fall back into old patterns, but practice. Be patient with your softness until it becomes your strength.

Let’s Keep Healing Together...

I used to punish my heart for bleeding — now I offer it flowers when it aches.

If this made you feel seen, come sit with me a little longer.

🎙️ Listen to my podcast Navigating Life Diaries

📸 Follow my visual diary on Instagram @_.selfcare_diary

💌 And don’t forget to subscribe to this blog — for more stories, more softness, more Sunny energy.

To every single one of you who subscribed, read, listened — even when I went quiet for a while — I see you. I thank you. I love you.

✨ To the Sunny reading this...

You are not too sensitive. You are not too much. You are just finally being kind to someone who always deserved it: you💕